MENTAL HEALTH

I originally published this blog in January. But since May is officially Mental Health Awareness month I'm republishing. May is quickly running out and the subject is too important to mention only once a year.

Is the new mental health awareness helpful to those of advanced age? Oh, yes!

Those of us living in the midst (and oftentimes mist) of the  golden years can be grateful that we live in a time when mental health struggles and solutions are at last coming out of the darkness and into the light. It’s a light for seniors shine.

Early in the days of struggling with careers and family, (circa 60’s) my longtime friend Judith and I used to fall into an occasional funk (aka depression) aggravated by a heavy dose of exhaustion. In addition, both of us being brought up in New England and having had built-in guilt drilled into our psyches, we dealt with all the issues of women during those changing times - and more. We would regularly angst about work problems, children challenges, money concerns, family conflicts, former boyfriends (the ones we should have married) and what all this bra burning really meant. We were not activist, just women determined to live life our way. (Which was not much different than a man’s way. This type of twisted (not) thinking often led to battles with male colleagues.)

In the interest of full disclosure, Judith and I did most of our angsting accompanied by a glass of scotch or a generous pour of wine…or two.   

At the time, the stigma of mental health issues was strong. Folks did not put grandma out on the front porch where her ramblings could be heard. They hid her. No one was anxious to admit to the “weakness.” inherent in requiring therapy. Especially if you were raised in New England like Judith and me. Still, being strong willed women risking a heavy case of stigma would not have let that stop us from seeking professional help…if we could have afforded therapy.

Thankfully, awareness and intelligence is close to triumphing over the stigma born of ignorance.

Judith and I found venting to one another was always helpful. Women venting to women is as old as time. Before Freud there were women sharing their secrets and fears with one another. The ability to talk to a trustworthy confidant was key to “getting ahold of ourselves.” 

A conversation of intelligence, honesty and kindness offer support. For anyone, any gender, anything, anytime. To this day. In the 60’s it was paramount. Judith and I used basic commands.

“Get ahold of yourself!” was a popular admonition as was, “Get a grip!”

 “Snap out of it,” is still a favorite to this day. If nothing else, such commands made us laugh. As if.

According to National Institute of Mental Health at least 1 in 4 older adults experience some mental disorder, the most prevalent being anxiety, depression and dementia. It’s expected due to the aging population this number will double by 2030.

Depression is the most common mental health issue with older people.  Anxiety is a close second. And dementia the most feared.

I have been an optimist all my life. My friends have even accused me of being a boring Pollyanna. But a few months ago I fell into a fairly deep depression.

Depression that hit me in waves. My attempts to talk myself out of it were unsuccessful. I was not interested in writing another book. The industry has changed so much and I felt too old to churn out as many a year as needed.

Also, I was alive longer than I’d planned. Most of my friends had passed. I was living in a new town where I knew no one except for family members. The reason I was in a new town was to be close to family. But no one wants to bother busy family unless absolutely necessary. I dwelled in a place called “alone.”  Although I was grateful for my reasonably good health and my daughter who kept urging me to “get out.”  Still, I was stuck. I took morning naps and afternoon naps. Always exhausted, I didn’t know what to do.

How do you plan a new future when you’re in your eighties? How long can any new plans or a new future, last?

I’m not certain of the time frame when my depression lifted. I believe it started when I rescued a puppy. Someone with big brown eyes and a wagging tail was depending on me. When talking to the dog was not enough, I enrolled in a lifelong learning class for some brain activity and engaging discussion. What followed was a volunteer application. Finally, an organization which could use my skills and experience.

And then, well I currently have no time to be depressed.

The CDC notes than depression, although common, is not a normal part of growing older and 80% of cases of depression are treatable. Yes, I thought my “elderly” depression was normal. I could have been feeling a lot better way more quickly had I not assumed.

Mental health awareness and treatment has come a long way in just the last twenty years. Education is readily available. Treatment methods have improved. Unfortunately, I was just too stubborn to look for help. And I didn’t know exactly what I was dealing with.

Recognizing the signs is important for getting treatment. While there are quite a few symptoms of mental disorder in aging seniors just a few cited by the National Institute of Health and NIMH include, and not necessarily in this order:

1) Change in mood, energy level or appetite

2) Feeling flat, having trouble feeling positive emotions

3) Misuse of alcohol or drugs

4) Difficulty sleeping or sleeping too much

5) Feeling angry, irritable or aggressive

6) Thoughts of death or suicide or suicide attempts

7) Misuse of alcohol or drugs

 

If you or anyone you know would like some help with a mental health issue, or if you’re ever in doubt like I was, reach out to a professional near you or call 988, the National Suicide and Crisis line.