ANOTHER BIRTHDAY

 What do you do when another birthday is just days away? Do you cringe or celebrate? I’m a celebration type person but this time I’m not so sure. I’ve reached a very high number, one I never expected to reach. That alone is cringe-worthy. But then again I may just be a babe. These days you see or read of people aged 87, 95, 100 and more, enjoying life. It’s daunting, but there may be years ahead of me.

If so, I’d better get busy. These will be my top five concerns as I blow out the candles. The numerous candles.

 

1) A new bucket list. I’ve completed the first list andf aged out on some of my original goals. (No Machu Pichu for me. My lung situation is not that good anymore. But I am still breathing!) The new bucket list I’m creating focuses on mild activities like boat tours and train trips. Nothing where I might need to exert myself. And of course an adventure on the cheap side would be welcome.

2) Practicing frugality. Speaking of cheap, I need to cut back on my spending. Because I did not expect my nest egg to last this long…or longer, it’s quickly diminishing. Apparently, I need to eat less and wear my clothes longer. Unfortunately, I never met a budget that I liked. I’m not even sure I know what that means or how to do it.

3) Love and romance. Although I have a record of marriage and divorce, I may have given up on love too soon. A little companionship would be welcome for the next hundred years. I might have to get back in the game. Even if this means only for occasional company, the search requires standing appointments for nails, hair and a new and an awesome wardrobe. And there goes whatever budget I’ve been able to work out!

4) Health care. Yes, my parts are rusty and wearing out but after a few health scares, at least I’m mobile. Self-care is important at any age but if not now, when?  I know I should exercise - something I’ve avoided for several, make that, many years now.

5) A tattoo. I may be the only person on the planet without one. So, I’ve been thinking of getting a sexy tattoo for this upcoming birthday. I think my grandgirls who were going to do it with me have opted out. (They are beautiful, they really don’t need body embellishment.) I may have to opt out as well. I can’t find a spot on my body, wrist or ankle that provides a smooth surface for the artist.

There is one more concern. This struggle is real.

A recent news report stated that anti-aging products are a two trillion dollar business. Two trillion! A variety of colorful tablets promise to put a halt to your body’s aging by months or even years. Mind you, none of these supplements are approved by the FDA. And there are absolutely no guarantees.

I’ve never taken any anti-aging products but now may be the time - what do I have to lose? Except money. And there goes the budget again!

 

SMALL BUT SCARY

 So, several weeks ago I suffered a small but scary stroke. I lost my words, my sight, my hearing, and all sensation. I lost me.

A writer without words.

I was not unconscious but I was not conscious. I spiraled in pitch black space until I woke up in the recovery room over thirty minutes later.

Fortunately, I was already in the hospital, recovering from an out-patient scheduled procedure when this happened. My daughter and I were talking, both fully expecting to be on our way home in an hour. She was driver that day. What ensued so suddenly frightened her too. She told me the emergency team came to the surgery floor and took me down to the emergency room. “Do you remember being in the elevator?”

No.

Although this episode was the direct result of the earlier out-patient procedure it doesn’t mean it’ll never happen again. High blood pressure can cause strokes. High blood pressure is an inherited condition for me and one that as yet is not under control.  

I spent the night in the hospital for observation and testing. The MRI of my brain showed no brain damage, although my brain had been deprived of blood for several minutes - that is one way stroke happens. (I know friends and maybe family may be of the opinion that brain damage happened to me some time ago!)

Now I have a new doctor, a neurologist, new medication and an appointment with the caring professionals at the stroke center.

After my release from the hospital I cancelled a writer’s conference I’d planned on attending. I lost my confidence during those lost minutes. I’m leery of traveling alone in case of another episode. My goal is to get over that fear.

I will never again lightly dismiss hearing about a TIA, transient ischemic attack no matter how long it lasts.

My psychological recovery is almost complete. To say I was shaken is an understatement. But I’m working on regaining my mojo and continuing my adventures in aging.